SMART Goal Setting

You've just started therapy or you've come back to therapy after a bit of a break looking to work on some stuff that's come up in your life and needs a bit of attention - already a great start, we love a bit of proactive self management!

The therapist pipes up with "so what are your goals then?" and for whatever reason your unbound, imaginative, reflective and expansive mind has just drawn 6 blanks and a side of panic - "WHAT ARE MY ACTUAL GOALS THOUGH?!".

That's fine, it happens to everyone and goal setting isn't as easy as it is to always identify "I'm noticing a problem" largely because a goal would involve understanding some level of what the solution might be. So if you're coming in with a "how on earth do I do this?" mindset - we've got you.

SMART goal setting is traditionally a CBT based approach to support really clear, solution focussed work in therapy, so one - you can track how therapy is actually going, and two - you get absolute clarity on the piece of work you're doing (as sometimes therapy is about working on something or somethings specifically, systematically, instead of spag bol'ing the wall and seeing what sticks).

If you want to cut right to the chase, you can have a gander at the free & condensed resources we have around this here. If you want a bit more info or you're just happy sat in this email thread, below is the go:

SMART - she's an acronym, she's looking to get you critically and reflexively thinking, and she's after a process you yourself can, want and are willing to commit to. The smarter the goals, the easier they are to reach, and that just gets us in the confidence > competency cycle where we start recognising that we're capable of many a thing, once we've had proof from having taken smaller steps to reach bigger issues. The more we learn, the more we grow, the more we grow the more we learn - and the wisdom carries us through life so that we continue to build on the generations before us who got us to "maybe mental health and self development is something we should all take a bit more seriously?".

So let's have a look then, what does it mean here to be SMART?:

• Specific: Instead of "stop being anxious," focus on exactly what you want to do or face, for example, "practice a 3-minute breathing exercise before my presentation". Maybe it's "reduce anxiety enough so I can leave the house" or "reduce anxious thoughts by 20% and replace them with positive or neutral ones". Maybe it's "learn to ask questions before assuming the worst/negative" - these might all stem from "I'm recognising I'm anxious" or "my anxiety has gotten out of control", and from where you've spotted the problem, we can then identify specific solutions and/or goals.

  
  

• Measurable: Define success with solid metrics so you know if you're making progress or just telling yourself (or your therapist) you are. For example, "rate my anxiety from 1-10 before and after trying an exercise". You could also look at "by the end of these 12 weeks of therapy I will...." or "after I've completed X therapy I will feel/think X differently". Above, where we've talked about percentages, you might internally know what a 20% difference looks or feels like, so as long as it can be measured, it can be monitored for progress. When we identify progress - it informs motivation to keep going, which we often need when we're doing something new or genuinely, hard.

• Achievable: Set goals entirely within your own control, not dependent on other people's actions or external factors you can't predict or change. For example here, if you were to say "improve relationship with partner", this is only half your responsibility, they need to do their bit of yard work to maintain the connection. But you might say "improve my communication with my partner", because you recognise you're not being open perhaps, and know this needs work from your side of the fence. It's also helpful to know that if we're measuring something you're half committed to (meaning you're not actively doing the work outside of therapy), we can't really know how effective you can be in 1 week, 2 weeks, 3 weeks etc. and we can't actually know if therapy isn't working (which lots of people default to) or if you're just not ready to do the work. If it's the latter, that, then becomes a part of the reality.

• Relevant/Realistic: Ensure the goal aligns with your core values and directly targets the specific thoughts or behaviours you want to change. What are core values? The values you live by and believe in, what matters to you, and what guides you to your highest self. Are they realistic? Why do we want them realistic? Well because if you set yourself up for something massive and miles away from where you're at - and you don't nail that goal, you might tell yourself you just can't do it, it's not possible or revert to negative beliefs like "I'm not good enough". It's a bit like couch to 5k - we take steps towards the goal knowing we can't just suddenly be at a 5k sprint if we've been in a couch like state.

• Time-Bound: Set a clear deadline or a specific time frame, for example "once a day for the next 5 days" to prevent avoidance and maintain your momentum. If you're in a structured therapy you might say "in the next 12 weeks I will...." and work within that framework, either way, we need a time frame, to keep ourselves in a structure and committed to the process for change. Deadlines help us all, so the more we commit ourselves to an outcome, the easier it is then to measure that outcome, to reflect on the realistic nature of it in retrospect, why it was or wasn't achievable (what barriers came up?) and whether or not it's specificity needs some adjusting or a new goal emerges altogether - as a result of meeting this one.

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Haven't set any goals yet? You can literally start today, and you don't need therapy to be self accountable or self exploratory in your self development. Feel like you need some guidance but a bitta' distance in the process? We'd recommend Overcoming Low Self-Esteem by Melanie Fennell as a great place to start, that actively mirrors a CBT protocol, involves "doing the work" from a DIY stance and is incredibly informative.